In 2011 I was in the beautiful Koh Samui for New Years Eve to ring in 2012. I wanted 2012 to have meaning and after reading about an American woman who took a photo daily of something she was grateful for… I thought this was a great project to start 01/01/2012. So I did… the picture was of the beautiful fireworks I watched throughout the night and I posted it on a blog… the next day I got Samui Stomach and there wasn’t a lot to be grateful for. Because it was meant to be daily and we were back a week later with my stomach still suffering – I didn’t continue.
It turns out 2012 was an amazing and difficult year. The optimist in me wants to say maybe the project would have been a good distraction and an empowering challenge when faced with the hard times.
My Mum was diagnosed with terminal Cancer in November 2010, she was given months but Mum fought on and was a big reason why I wanted to find things to be grateful for, because she was always so fun loving, positive and determined.
On March 2nd 2012, my partner and I found out we were expecting a baby. As we say, ‘a pleasant surprise’. We had been together for eight and a half years and if we had waited to ‘plan’ it all out I think it would have taken another five to start a family! We were elated and excited to share this news with our families and in particular my Mum. I think my biggest fear of losing my Mum was that she wasn’t going to be around to share these things with me. When would I get married? When would I have my first child? How many Children would I have? I know she is always around me, but to be here and share it would be different.
In April 2012 a beautiful friend of mine was also diagnosed with terminal cancer at the age of 28. She was told she wouldn’t see her 30th, well she didn’t see her 29th. She was a hard working person, loyal friend and only dreamt of what many of us do… to get married one day and have a family. Riding a roller coaster of emotions with her and the guilt of being pregnant when I knew that she would never experience it was really hard. I miss her everyday and am so sad she never got to meet my son.
Jade told me she was sick 15/04/2012. Jade died 13/09/2012. Her birthday was 16/10/2012, the same day my Mum went in to Pallative Care. I was due on 08/11/2012. Oliver was born 14/11/2012 and my Mum died three days later on 17/11/2012. Mum got to hold my gorgeous boy. She knew I had a boy, that his name was Oliver, that I was ok and then she could let go…
My blog is for my Mum who is the bravest person I know. A beautiful person both inside and out who always encouraged my creative pursuits and would be happy that I am finally doing something to put all of my interests in the one place. I intend to use this blog as a place to share my ideas on interiors, weddings, events and celebrate the beautiful Melbourne lifestyle.
I would often call Mum and ask what she was doing she would often say ‘”Oh, just pottering”. So that’s what I am doing here… just pottering and loving it!
Loving Pottering 